From Home to the Hill: Amherst Siblings’ Perspectives

For many students, Amherst serves as a home away from home: a place to foster a new family distinct from their blood relatives. But, for some, attending Amherst doesn’t mean completely leaving their family behind. In this Family Weekend-inspired article, we spoke to four pairs of siblings attending Amherst together this semester to find out a bit more about what it’s like to brave college with a sibling by their side.

The Application Process

We first spoke to two sets of twins: Leo Arms ’27 and Zoe Arms ’27, and Drew Stephens ’26 and Thomas Stephens ’26. The twins’ paths to Amherst were shaped by the unique considerations that come with applying to the same college as your sibling.

For the Arms twins, attending college together had not been the original plan and was actually something they wanted to avoid. “It was a fraught time … We didn’t want to go to the same college,” Zoe Arms said in reference to college-decision time. In fact, the two tried to safeguard against the likelihood of attending school together, applying to all different schools, except for Amherst. 

Growing up, the pair had shared a bedroom along with many extracurriculars. To them, college was an opportunity to get some space. Despite this, Zoe Arms reflected that, “It just so happened that by the spring we were both sort of like, ‘Huh, we're going to Amherst.”

The Stephens brothers’ application process was influenced by their shared interest in competing in track and cross country at Amherst. “We didn't really think about it that much looking back, but we were considering most of the same schools,” Thomas Stephens explained. “So when we both had the opportunity to go to Amherst, it kind of just came together.” Amherst’s combination of excellent academics and good athletics encouraged them to both commit here at the start of their senior year. 

For non-twin siblings, the younger sibling’s application process was often influenced by the experiences of the older sibling. Fahian Joy ’28 explained that, while he didn’t explicitly encourage his younger sister, Adrita Risha ’29, to come to Amherst, he did share his own positive experiences at the school with her. “I was kind of just talking about how great Amherst was because I [go here] and I have a lot of school spirit,” Joy said. Risha said that her brother’s experiences did increase her interest in Amherst, but that she was ultimately most interested in the opportunity Amherst offered to explore her varied interests without a set field of study in mind. “[Fahian] really talked about how much Amherst was a good fit for him … but not really for me specifically,” Risha said. “I think he wanted me to figure [it out myself] … Coincidentally enough, even though we have contrasting interests, I think Amherst was still a good fit for me as well.”

Cynthia Alexander ’26 also emphasized the importance of giving her younger sister, Sarah Alexander ’28, the space to make her own choices about college. “I think that I was encouraging Sarah to apply here … but I also wanted her to make her own decision on where to go,” Cynthia Alexander said in a written correspondence with The Student. She also mentioned that their older sister, Brooke Alexander ’24, attended Amherst as well. While this did impact Cynthia Alexander’s decision-making about Amherst, she explained it was not the biggest factor in her decision-making. Sarah Alexander expressed a similar sentiment. “Having family at Amherst helped make me want to apply, but did not have a part in my choice to come here,” she said. “I wanted to choose a place where I will be happy regardless of where my sisters are because I won’t be with Cynthia for all four years.” Still, Sarah Alexander said that “Having older sisters who go here definitely gave me more incentive to apply, and I am so happy that I did!”

Family Reactions

Of the siblings we interviewed, nearly all of their families’ reactions to their decisions to attend Amherst were positive. Many siblings shared that their families were spared some of the logistical maneuvering that would have been required if they had attended separate schools. For the Arms twins, Leo Arms shared that “[Our parents] were glad, because they were like, ‘Now we don't have to go to two commencements and … drop you off at two separate places.’” 

Each set of siblings also reflected on their parents’ involvement in their college application processes and whether or not their family’s desires impacted their eventual decision to go to Amherst. Sarah Alexander shared, “Our parents were happy that we chose Amherst, but mostly because we each thought we would like it for different reasons.” Similarly, Joy and Risha shared that their mom was happy to find out they got into the same college.

The Stephens brothers shared that they likely gravitated towards Amherst because of the values their parents had instilled in both of them: “I think they just said the same stuff about college in general to both of us. So we probably [had] similar ideas about the college [we were] willing to go to,” said Thomas Stephens. 

Many sibling duos also shared that their parents were happy they would be at the same school so that they could take care of each other. “My mother was probably like, ‘Okay, you can take care of each other, I will worry less,’” Leo Arms said. Risha echoed a similar experience,  “My mom … saw this as my brother’s way of watching over me,” she said.

Navigating Freshman Year

The shift from living together at home to living together at Amherst was an important transition for these siblings, and one that they sought to handle carefully. When Leo and Zoe Arms arrived at Amherst their freshman year, they agreed not to talk to each other for the first two weeks so that they could focus on meeting new people. 

“I think the goal was: Let’s make sure we have different sets of friends,” Leo Arms explained. “We thought that was important, coming from a small school where we had basically all the same friends for our whole life before this,” he said. The Arms’ plan largely worked, although the siblings still ended up in many similar circles. “We sort of gravitate towards the same types of people,” Zoe explained, “so we can't really stay that far [apart].” After their initial efforts at branching out, though, the twins acknowledged that they then felt comfortable spending more time together once they had each established themselves at Amherst.

Risha and Joy also had a similar plan for Risha’s freshman year. “I made sure [Risha] didn’t spend too much time with me back when she didn’t have friends,” Joy said. Risha, meanwhile, expressed relief that she hadn’t initially defaulted to only spending time with her brother. “I thought in the beginning I would spend a lot of time with him … but I think I forced myself not to constantly go to him and to talk to other people,” she explained. But like the Arms’ twins, now that Risha has gotten settled at Amherst, she and Joy spend more time together.

Academic and Social Life

 Navigating the family-social life balance continued beyond freshman year for many sibling pairs. For the Stephens twins, their time together is shaped by their shared athletic experiences on the cross-country and track teams. Being on the same teams “makes us be around each other all the time,” Thomas Stephens explained. “Our friend group is just guys on the cross country team, so we have the same friends.” That shared experience has also carried into the classroom, as Drew and Thomas Stephens had their freshman seminar together and are taking a class together this semester as well. Being identical twins, this has led to some amusing mix-ups. “[Our freshman seminar professor was] kind of confused,” Drew Stephens explained. “At Amherst, most people either don’t know we’re twins or can’t tell us apart. People are saying ‘hi’ to me all the time that I don’t know, and I just say ‘hi’ back.”

 Zoe and Leo Arms, on the other hand, have deliberately avoided having classroom overlap. “We both took a lot of [biology] and [chemistry] classes our first two years, and we organized them purposely such that we never took a class at the same time,” Leo said, “I think it's just nice to have your own experiences.”

The Alexander sisters have had less academic and extracurricular overlap at Amherst, but still find ways to spend time together. “I think [we] have had different experiences at Amherst,” Sarah Alexander said. “We participate in different activities, but we still see each other a lot around campus,” she said.

Joy and Risha also participate in their own separate extracurricular activities. However, as Joy noted, Amherst’s small size definitely impacts how much time he spends with his sister. “I hang out with her friends. On occasion, she hangs out with mine,” Joy said. “We’re all familiar. It’s too small of a school to not be.”

Favorite Reflections

When asked about the best part of having each other on campus, Leo Arms didn’t hesitate with his response: “Oh, well, I love Zoe … [She’s been] my best friend [for] my whole life. I can just go say hi to [her] anytime — that’s pretty nice.” The Stephens twins felt the same way. “You always have a reliable friend at all times, someone you’ve known your whole life,” Thomas Stephens said. 

Other students relayed a similar sense of comfort that came with knowing a sibling was always nearby. “It’s nice to know [Cynthia is] around even though we don’t have school-related activities together,” Sarah Alexander said. For many, having a sibling on campus made them feel a little closer to home. “It’s hard to feel homesick when you have family here,” Drew Stephens said. Joy also spoke about the positive effects of having his sister on campus: “We’ve been close throughout our lives … It’s nice [to] get to keep that going … [a] built-in friend, kind of what siblings are all about.”

To Zoe Arms, it was simple: Though they might not have planned to come to school together, and it might not have been the easiest transition at first, going to college with her twin was totally worth it. “It’s honestly the best thing. There’s no part of my life that’s not made better by Leo,” she said.